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Blast
"Everything involving Tags and the members is complicated. '' ''Literally everything. '' ''It shouldn't work. '' ''On paper, it's a disaster '' ''Yet we somehow have a community." ~ Blast describing the hellhole he calls a friend circle to a non-tagger friend. Blast is a fairly major and veteran tagger; not as old as Relk_Cehi or Acquiesce, yet older than TGRZwetzich or Bonkspenser, for example. He usually relies on jokes about geek culture, such as video games and the like, as well as puns. He uses his own unique brand of humor to make his tags stand out. History While it's unclear exactly when Blast joined TF2Tags, his earliest surviving submission was posted on October 16, 2014, at about 11:00 pm in America, about an idiot kid Blast referred to as "Jimmy". When he first joined the site, he started off the way most new users do: shitposting. That ended up getting his ass in a sling with Relk and Jesse. The two soon set him straight, leading Blast to raise the quality of his posts and thus garner several thousand points since then. Blast has survived many shitstorms either as a bystander or full-on participant, ranging from Teaquin's missbombs, The Racist Anon, all the way through every single Taggening. Throughout it all, Blast has remained a cool-headed, positive individual, even acting (and usually failing) as a mediator for many taggers... though he isn't above a little insanity now and again, like being part of the Wahfia. In that event, Blast was given the honor and title of Wahmbassador, spreading the word of Waluigi to the uninformed masses. Being the "nice guy" on the site, Blast isn't afraid to voice just how he feels when things get out of hand or someone is wronged. He was responsible for introducing currently-inactive tagger Timberwoof to the site as they're very good friends in real life. In addition, Blast was on hand when Timberwoof made each of his triumphant returns, the most recent one involving Timberwoof creating a Bee Movie set. Recently, with a number of influxes of new taggers, Blast has more-or-less stepped out of the limelight (what little he had, anyways) and plays more of a background role nowadays. He doesn't usually make a big deal of himself or anything he does, seeing how TF2Tags has made a shift towards the newer people. He's still as dependable as always as a friend or a confidant. Blast made his official exit on his birthday, February 3, 2018, in response to the site shutting down in 2019. Here's hoping someone revives the site, and he makes a return. Blast has grown over the years, and anyone who hasn't kept up on the TF2Tags Discord would be taken a bit aback by Blast's change in behavior. He hasn't gone bad per se, but he has changed from the happy go lucky friendly dude to someone with a more laid-back and cynical approach to life. Don't get it twisted, he's still more than likely to be your pal, but he's not too keen on getting involved in disputes between others, having seen it blow up in his face (no pun intended) too many times to count. Relationships Blast's circle of friends and alliances is probably the biggest on the site with too many quite a lot of people being inside it, with the most notable being: *Acquiesce *Twelve Hour Respawn *A Fucking Idiot *L'Étranger *Danjin, Master of Skelenomics *EGG-Z *Crimson Blitz *Expand *Fancytag *Jesse *Makin' Bacon *Marmot *Player 1 + Player 2 *Sensible Haircut *Walumancer ...Basically a lot of people. Concurring in this vein, TheOnlyGuyEver once described Blast as one of approximately 4 taggers that are the most grounded in reality (the other 3 names are unknown). Anyone who's actually willing to mediate in such a toxic environment is probably worthy of such a description. Blast has recently taken trans female tagger Cammie, more commonly known as Proto Kirby, under his wing in a pseudo-older brother role, and is fiercely protective of her. Nicknames Blast has used a lot of different aliases during his career, more so than most taggers. They usually either refer to a ongoing event/holiday, a certain point in his life, or reference [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/WWE WWE]. Examples include: * Blastbackcalhoon * Blast the Brinespawn * Zach "Blast" Calhoon (his real name with his nickname) * Shia LaBlast (a reference to Shia LaBeouf) * Bad News Blast (a reference to Bad News Barrett) * Dean AmBlast (a reference to Dean Ambrose) * Blast Ryder (a reference to Zack Ryder) * Stone Cold Blast (A reference to "Stone Cold" Steve Austin) * Macho Blast (a reference to "Macho Man" Randy Savage) * WAHcho Blast (Wahfia variation of the former) * A Macho Lover (Valentine's Day variation) * Gaster Blast (an [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Undertale Undertale] reference) * A Fucking Explosion (A reference to fellow tagger A Fucking Idiot) * Topical Blast, where he went on mini humor-driven rants on racism and SJWs. * Various holiday-themed nicknames, i.e. Spoopy Blast for Halloween. * BLAST CIPHER (A reference to Bill Cipher from [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gravity_Falls Gravity Falls].) * Broski Blast (Another reference/shout-out to Zack Ryder), which has more or less become his default nickname. Blast's nicknames on the Discord Server are even more varied and wacky. Most have been forgotten, but a few notable ones have been: * Radio * The Ditch Bitch (referencing a real life car accident he was in) * A Conviction to Find Liam Neeson * A Rebel Son with a Rebel Heart * Fade Away, My Rebel Son * Oxymoronic Similarities * The Fist Pump of God * Dirty Memes Done Dirt Cheap * Fuckhands McQueen * The Roar of The Crowd * Bitchcakes Jr. * Forceful Takeover * Ligma Headass, the Lord-King * This User is Not Available (the name is used for the release of Smash Ultimate and thus his inactivity) * Fresh, Reenergized Hatred * The F O R E V E R B O X * Daddy Backslide * Smoke and Lightning/Heavy Metal Thunder (both names lyrics in Born To Be Wild) * Doomslayer gives Isabelle a gun * Shut up I've fucking got this * Jangles Trivia * Blast is confirmed to be Autistic. * TGR once misspelled Blast's real name of Zach as "Sazh" and has refused to call him anything else ever since. * While not amazing, Blast has made quite a few SFM posters starring him and his friends as their main class. * Blast is the Head Honcho of the (now inactive) Steam Group "Taggers Against Humanity", even going so far as to create his own tagger-themed cardpack for the game, along with Fancytag's pack. The two later merged their packs into one giant heap of injokes. The group is now unfortunately dead. * While his representative item is Unique quality, he often adds Unusual effects and paints to reflect whatever the situation or his mood is. * Blast is a massive fan of professional wrestling, with WWE being the main focus, but he isn't afraid to venture out into other promotions. According to him, his favourite pro wrestler, no matter what, will always be Zack Ryder * Blast is a huge fan of TF2, obviously, but he's also a huge Nintendo fan, enjoying Mario, Zelda, Kirby, Smash Bros., Pokemon, Splatoon, and many others. * Other interests include: **JoJo's Bizarre Adventure **DOOM **The Flash (TV show) **Marvel movies and comics **Sonic the Hedgehog **The Binding of Isaac **Undertale **Minecraft **Fortnite **Ben 10 * Blast enjoys every version of Ben 10, with [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ben_10:_Omniverse Omniverse] being his favorite, and [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ben_10:_Alien_Force Alien Force] being his least favorite, though he doesn't think it's bad by any means. Category:Taggers Category:Generation 2